do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Randomize