Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize