Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
