i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize