She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
