Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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