Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Randomize
