No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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