Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
