He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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