South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
