I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
