i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I love having hate sex.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
