i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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