guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
