he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
