Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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