It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
