I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
