Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
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