Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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