dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize
