I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Randomize