I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I'm going to jail i love you
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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