Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
