"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Randomize
