I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
