i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
