how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
