That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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