People in love make me want to vomit
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You have to summon your inner elephant
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
