Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
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