no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
