I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
