that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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