It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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