and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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