It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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