i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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