I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
