I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
At least life still wants to fuck me.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
