I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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