God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize
