Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
