My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Randomize
