i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
