Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
where are my eyebrows?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
