i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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