If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
