yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
